How do you define yourself?

I find it difficult to define who I am.

But then definitions are not what humans are.

Its all about putting people in boxes isn't it?

Its a problem that I can't really imagine what I want to do.

In the future like.

In 6 months, I'll be in college coz it's expected of me.

I'll do languages coz they are useful to escape with.

I'll drink my liver out. 

I want to fall back into the abyss. But then I'm more than half way there.

I want to dance in the rain, and fuck on the kitchen table.

I want to bury my head into his neck and avoid the world.

I want to scream back to the storm and have tatoos all over.

I want to wear pretty dresses and dr martens.

I want to have a baby to nurture and a home and a cat.

I want to be loved for who I am, not who I pretend to be.

I want to show him who I really am.

But I don't know. And definitions are hard. 

Help?